I still haven't gotten to it yet.

I've been waiting for long enough. Trying to find the right time. I  tried to script the sentences in my brains but they were half occupied by unnecessary irrational thoughts, and i was afraid that the rational other part of it couldn't sustain all these anger and disappointment and sadness all jumbled up into a huge ball. 


now the huge ball has shrank and dried up; like how, huge pimples were on your face and part dried up, but still there- you see it and it annoys you to hell- but there's somewhat nothing much you can do about it other than wait. Try to wait patiently and be really calm about it. 


*fast forward*








I finally did it. it kinda came out naturally. 7am. all i got in return was a whole lot of junk excuses which i've heard a million and one times, followed by endless sarcasm and nonsensical babbles. 


Bullshit. that's the word. Friggin' bullshit- just to be more precise. 


I was completely calm, didn't lose my mind, didn't raise my voice. but i wasn't patient. i wasn't patient enough to wait for more bullshit which was repeated over and over again. i finally understood what it's like to hear something over and over again *yawns*. nor was i patient enough to wait for it to beat around the bush and then go back to square one. what do you see around the bush? bushes all the way. haha. so, SO predictable. 




I've been through so much shit, this one seems like nothing. on another perspective, it's because i've been through too much shit that this additional piece of shit has been added to the pile of shit i already have, i don't know if i can continue recruiting more shit.


you know what i did? 
-crawl back (slowly but painfully) into my bubble and try to protect myself from all those shit. I'm still in my lil bubble now. hopefully it won't be too painful to crouch inside here, hopefully the walls would be thick enough to save me from all the pain when the bull shits on the bubble. lol :S 








on a lighter note,

we saw this on the wall! i think they were trying to be artistic by spray painting all these cameras and tripods WHITE, but i also think it's a failed attempt. i mean, surely these things could be put to better use. or maybe give them some colours. 

the world could do with more colours. 

ps: Congrats bro on your UPSR! i know you didn't study AT ALL so i think that's quite an achievement. sigh but your smart brains won't get you very far, remember that. there're a lot of smart people out there who are just smart but with really low EQ and think they're know-it-alls and that they're always right. i know a perfect living example. so don't be like that. love. 


pps: a proper photographer once told me that the camera ALWAYS puts on weight to a person.. and i think i agree. that's the reason why i blurred out myself in the picture above :S